3AM Thoughts: Inconsistency


(Old photo of mine, taken on film. Mostly irrelevant.)

I’m a very inconsistent person.

As a blogger, my features are rare occurrences and are usually sporadic. My posts are too infrequently consecutive. Pretty far in between, just like my updates on Instagram or anywhere else for that matter. (Except Twitter, of course.)

As a teenager, I go from hardworking to lazy, determined to unmotivated, easy-going to awkward. I’ve also had my fair share of hobbies I was passionate about until it burned out. I still like most of them, but I lose my enthusiasm and move on.

Maybe that’s natural. Maybe it happens to everyone. But some days I just find myself looking back and thinking, I wish I kept that up. That attitude, that passion, that hobby or whatever.

ipad reading ebook on film

(Old irrelevant film photo deux)

Meanwhile, books and the love for reading have remained a constant in my life. For that, I’m thankful. Despite the slumps, the hangovers, the struggles of figuring out what the hell to read next, I know books will never cease to hold on to a piece of my heart- it will always have a place there.

That was really the point of my post. To say that I’m still here, even though it might look like I’m not. To say that I still love books, and that I’m still staying bookish.

So, if you’re from my side of the world or from across the ocean and are still up, what are you thinking about? How is your weekend going?

27 Responses

  1. Hazel, I feel like that all the time! Perhaps nothing is greater than your passion for books, which is not a bad thing at all :) And it shows! I look forward to all your posts, as you probably already know by now :p

    I think it’s normal to move on, how else will you discover the things you really love?

  2. I did stop reading for a long time in college. I was spending so much time reading for class (English major) that I never read for myself. And college was all about hanging out with people and not reading at home. So, when I graduated and started reading again, it was amazing! I read way more now than I ever did, but it makes me so happy to do so. Books = love.

  3. I definitely know what you mean! I think everyone feels like that every now and then. I’m definitely grateful that I’ve managed to keep reading and blogging throughout all these years that it’s become routine. I think though, with changing passions, it comes with getting older and figuring out who I am.

    Planning to hibernate this weekend with a bunch of textbooks because exams, haha.

  4. we all still keep figuring out what to do next…i don’t mind as long as my love for reading and books remain constant for me :)

  5. I’m exactly the same! My blog posts are inconsistent and varying, as are my hobbies and interests! But I have ALWAYS been a bookworm, and always will be, even if that is inconsistent too and I went through a period of not reading and then being addicted again. But I’m glad I’m not the only one like this :) Amanda x

  6. I love those photos of yours. I’m an inconsistent blogger too. Although I do the Sunday Post every week, it can be guaranteed I won’t do every single thing I list on there.

    I know what you mean with the “I wish I kept that up”. I feel that way now about so many hobbies.

    Stay bookish always. I just started reading again recently, which is ridiculous because in high school I read a lot. Then Senior year and college sort of changed all of that.

    This is such a great post, thanks for sharing your thoughts with the blogosphere. :)

  7. When I wanted to write this comment it was after midnight, I had tea, it was dark, I was listening to good music and reading this post somehow put me in a really good mood and I just wanted to board a plane and fly to cuddle you, I don’t even know. This is kind of a pointless comment but I relate to the post on a spiritual level :p

  8. Often musings past midnight don’t seem to have a point but they’re still thoughts we somehow need to put out there and share with the world. I’m glad you did because you wrote a beautiful post on your love for reading, Hazel :)

  9. I could be very inconsistent at times, too! One day I feel so motivated to do something, and the next day, I feel too lazy to do that thing. Like you, I know for sure that I will always love reading despite the slumps. I’m not sure about blogging though.

  10. I can SO relate to this! I haven’t blogged in forever and somedays I wanna go back into it with full force and other days I just want to never hear the word review again. I’ve been trying to get back into the “groove” but have been failing obviously xD

  11. I like to think that I’m a pretty consistent person when it comes to things I really and truly and deeply care about. Like you, there has never been a moment where reading has ceased its importance.

    But with other things … my love doesn’t fade, essentially, but I become less enamoured with them. For example: Tumblr. I had an active Tumblr for about for years, and at one point, it was one of the things I loved best. But then when i started blogging, I kind of had to choose. So I chose blogging, and now I haven’t used the Tumblr in months (I go on randomly sometimes to try and keep it updates, but inevitably fail). This has happened with several Tumblrs.

    When I was a kid, I took up the violin, and then gave it up. I seriously wish I hadn’t now. I would absolutely LOVE to be able to play an instrument – especially one so beautiful.

    Anyway, I definitely know what you mean about inconsistency. But if you love it, you’ll come back to it, I think :)

  12. You know, I’ve felt this way a lot about many things in my life – the piano, ballet, photography. There are moments where I regret choices I’ve made or the way I’ve allowed certain things to fall away. But I tend to console myself with the fact that there is still time – to live, to relearn, to learn more. There’s so much opportunity for us to try anything and everything (well, hopefully, the good, helpful things and not the harmful ones) and that is a lovely possibility.

  13. I feel like this all the freakin time! Every time I have a new idea for a feature for the blog or a project, I quickly shut them down saying that I wouldn’t be able to finish what I started.. as always. My blog hasn’t been active like the way it was before since July and at some point, I even thought about shutting it down. But like you, my love for reading has been always present and I know one of these days, I would need a space where I can express my thoughts and love or hate for a certain book. I just hope it comes sooner than later.

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